Old Men

A lot of people have known their grandfathers. I am one of those who has never known either of them. Both of my grandfathers died in the mid-70s so I missed out on learning in person what kind of men they were. One would think that I would have found a grandfather-type person to look up to, but I still have moments when I have to remind myself that my own father is around. I guess I got used to having to live without him when I was younger.
I suppose I should say why I'm even writing this. I've got this curiosity as to the man I could have been had I gotten to know the men my parents once knew and called Dad. I would like to have seen the traits and quirks my grandfathers shared with my parents. To have seen what men they were would be a dream come true, but I'll have to make my own assessment of who they were from their children and the stories their children have of them.
In the meantime, I'm searching for someone willing to clue me in on what having a grandfather is like. I didn't have many male role models growing up. My brother thought he could be the father type with me, but while he tried to play the part I sort of missed out on what it was like to have a brother. So much for the male role models of my childhood. By all accounts, I had none. I don't regret much of anything in hindsight, but I know it would have been nice not to have felt so isolated and alone as a child.
Old men have experienced a lot more than I can fathom right now. If I can find someone with a cache of wisdom to talk with, look up to, and be supported by I just might be better equipped to handle my future obstacles. I may never find such a person and even if I don't it simply means that I will have to work harder and make a few more mistakes than I would have had I been able to take the advice of someone more seasoned than myself. I'm not afraid to go it alone. I've done it before, but I wouldn't mind the company.