Driving home from my vacation I'm reminded that I have some important decisions to make soon. I could use a good friend with a good ear who is willing to call me on my crap and keep me from excusing everything away. My excuses are why I'm in the pickle I'm in, but now it's time I pickled the beast.
I'm caught between (1) finishing my college education (a mediocre performance so far) while earning a nursing assistant certification and then continuing to medical school in Guadalajara, Mexico - if they'll take me, (2) studying abroad for a semester or two, (3) taking time off to work and travel for a while, (4) transferring to another college, or (5) just disappearing for awhile until I can get my head on straight. Sometimes I feel like life is going by faster than I can learn to take advantage of it.
I don't feel overwhelmed at the moment . Even though my trip was only three days it was enough for me to relax and put things back into perspective. Roswell was kind of a dud, but Carlsbad Caverns was fascinating. Even though the caverns themselves were a gypsum-limestone reef at one point, the formations inside took hundreds of thousands of years to form once the reef was drained of its seawater. Persistence leads to beauty. It can take a long time before one's work is acknowledged and appreciated. I suppose I should take heed of the caverns and not feel so badly about taking so long to get my two degrees. The most important thing about pursuing a goal is enjoying the journey while working toward fulfilling the goal. The achievement of the goal is just a validation of the good times experienced along the way.
This is an exciting time in my life and I almost let that sense of optimism and hope slip away from me. I'd love to change the world, but without that positive spirit and ability to enjoy the ride there isn't much point to having a goal to achieve if in the end I can't look back on the good, hard work that was accomplished and think, "I enjoyed that."
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